Pelotonia, year six

Six years ago, in February 2018, two close friends convinced me to sign up to do a hard thing: commit to raising $2000 and ride 100 miles in the Ohio August heat with one goal in mind: end cancer.

Pelotonia: 100% of Participant-Raised Funds Support Cancer Research — every single dollar raised goes directly toward innovative cancer research.

When I signed up, I decided to ride in honor of my mom — a cancer survivor. Little did I know that by ride day, my entire relationship with Pelotonia and what it meant to me would radically change. My dad would be diagnosed with metastatic colorectal cancer; my mom would be diagnosed with breast cancer; and I just had to keep. it. together.

Keep it together. Maintain focus. Be the support.

Since then, lots has happened: over $100,000,000 have been raised to support cancer research; treatments have been discovered; my mom beat cancer (again); my dad did not.

My life has been heavily influenced, and at times wrecked, by cancer.

Yet, I repeat my mantra: Keep it together. Maintain focus. Be the support.
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This month — colorectal cancer awareness month — I did a big thing and (finally) focused and supported myself.

Without too much detail, after a year of troublesome GI symptoms, advocating for myself, and fighting Alberta Health Services, I’m relieved I got negative results today. This last year has been filled with an indescribable anxiety that will now be replaced by continued hypothesis testing, but I’m relieved to have fought and supported myself, in spite of fear.

Six years ago I wouldn’t have thought I’d have so much of my life and energy taken up by cancer, but here I am.

Cancer has shaped my life in ways I couldn’t imagine, and I know I’m not alone — even if it felt so lonely going through it.

This year, in addition to riding 100 miles in August and raising over $2000 to support cancer research, I have a goal of publishing reflections on how cancer affects not only those diagnosed, but also caretakers and supporters. It may be emotional, critical, and raw — but it’ll be reflections of life. I plan to post on a weekly/bi-weekly basis, depending on emotional availability, with the hope that whoever needs to read this finds it and knows that they’re not alone.

In the mean time, if you have a few dollars to spare, I know a fantastic non-profit cancer research organization where your dollars can help save lives: https://www.pelotonia.org/caro